Okay, section 138 ... 138 ... okay, here we are. Hold the -- Chris, don't do that to your sister. Samantha, don't encourage him. Just don't respond. You're tipping your soda, careful, CHRIS DAMMIT STOP THAT. Okay. Row N. Z ... W ... T ... N. Seats 15, 16, and 17, guys. Come on. Keep up. Seats 15 ... oh, excuse me, I think these are ours. Yeah, you're one down, I think. Thanks. Thanks. Okay. Okay, we're here.

1-0? What the crap? 

Sorry about that. Let me catch you up. Ian Kinsler led the game off with a single on the first pitch from Doug Fister. Elvis Andrus then chopped the third pitch of his at-bat just through the right side. Josh Hamilton got jammed and, uh, fisted a pitch just over the reach of Jhonny Peralta to score Kinsler. Just a few minutes after the game started, seven pitches in, the Rangers were up 1-0 and threatening to score more.

Fister did some exemplary damage control, though, getting Michael Young to ground into a double play, and striking out Adrian Beltre. Still, the early scoring really did a lot to quiet the raucous Detroit crowd.