No, really. That's the honest truth, and it's the only thing that worked as a headline. Apparently Mike Schmidt is writing columns for the Associated Press now, and you know what really grinds his gears? People with hard-to-read autographs:

I made out Roy Halladay, Jim Thome and Jimmy Rollins. A couple had the number — thank you Chase Utley, Ryan Howard, Cliff Lee and Hunter Pence. That was a great clue, at least for me, but what about the person who buys it at the auction and may not know the numbers?

Boy, one "(with)" snuck in there would have made that a much more interesting quote. As is, it's an entire column that Mike Schmidt wrote for the AP regarding the legibility of autographs. You can resume doing whatever it was you were doing now, but this seemed important.