According to everyone, Tino Martinez is the Miami Marlins' new batting coach. He's apparently been quite the hot property, as the Red Sox reportedly were interested in hiring Tino too. Imagine! A bidding war for a batting coach, when nobody even knows for sure if they matter!

Here's something I forgot: In 1997, Tino Martinez hit 44 home runs and finished second in the voting for the American League Most Valuable Player Award! He was a really good hitter. You might wonder if that necessarily makes him a really good hitting coach, but on the other hand you might have wondered the same thing about Mark McGwire, and that worked out well enough for the Cardinals.

Since retiring as a player after the 2005 season -- a season, by the way, in which he once hit eight home runs in the span of eight games -- Martinez has dabbled in broadcasting, and also coaching; granted, it was first-base coaching, but coaching is coaching. He'll be fine. Just like the Marlins. What could possibly go wrong.