Dirk Hayhurst is a former major league pitcher (with the 2008 Padres and 2009 Blue Jays) who has also authored two books about baseball, The Bullpen Gospels and the recently released Out Of My League.

He's also known, via Twitter and otherwise, as "The Garfoose", which, according to his website, is:

a giant, fire breathing, half giraffe half moose with yellow fur and purple spots.

Hayhurst, or Garfoose, had signed to pitch for Nettuno in the Italian League this season. He was expected to be their opening day starter. Sunday, however, this series of tweets indicated that The Garfoose is back Stateside:

I'm back in the states. I regret I had to leave Italy for personal & professional reasons that I cannot fully disclose at this time.

— Dirk Hayhurst (@TheGarfoose) March 18, 2012

I'd also like to say I'm very sorry to leave so shortly after arriving, that it was not personal and I regret it happened the way it did.

— Dirk Hayhurst (@TheGarfoose) March 18, 2012

In short: contract violations, feral cats, the polizia, lost euros, a better job, gelato, and a man who screwed a cow... I was sad to leave

— Dirk Hayhurst (@TheGarfoose) March 18, 2012

All right, perhaps we should end right here. Hayhurst is funny and articulate in his books and maybe someday we'll hear the whole story. Or maybe he'll sign on with a major league organization; in 2011 he posted a 4.12 ERA and 1.27 WHIP in 11 starts with Triple-A Durham in the Rays organization. There are plenty of pitchers with numbers worse than that competing for major league jobs this spring.