Through two rounds, Prince Fielder had 16 home runs, Mark Trumbo had 13 home runs, and Carlos Beltran had 12 home runs. Through one round, Jose Bautista had 11 home runs, meaning he needed to hit just three home runs in the second round to meet up with Fielder in the championship. He hit two home runs because Jose Bautista is a choker who has never hit an important home run in his life. What that forced was a swing-off between Bautista and Trumbo, which is a thing that happens that makes the Home Run Derby longer. If you're still following along you have no right to complain. You're not even conscious and while you're clicking on these posts and looking at these words, you're not reading them, you're not processes them. You are a doll. The Home Run Derby has rendered you a human-sized doll.

Trumbo hit one home run in the swing off and Bautista defeated him immediately with two home runs and now Bautista has hit an important home run in his life. That's great news for whatever charity Bautista is here representing and terrible news for whatever charity Trumbo is here representing. Sure, great, Jose Bautista could win money for a charity. He's also keeping money from several other charities. Have we investigated which charities won't get money on account of Jose Bautista? Might be something here for you aspiring journalists.

Championship time. Last year, Robinson Cano beat Adrian Gonzalez in the championship. This year, Robinson Cano hit zero home runs in the Home Run Derby, and Adrian Gonzalez has six home runs at the break. Adrian Gonzalez has two-thirds as many home runs at the break as teammate Mike Aviles. Remember how earlier in this stream I embedded a tweet saying most players expected Robinson Cano to repeat as the champion? What have we learned about players?